<3 Tito

Many notes already on the Red Sox Spring Training Media Extravaganza™. Manny shows up three days early bucking everyone's expectations. Of course, he could decide to pull a Bonds and just sit around the locker room in his leather easy chair. Sources report his dreads look "less Predator-like" this year.

Dice-K threw batting practice; Tito compares him to Michael Jordan, except the former Seibu Lions star "can't dunk." He said the comparison was mostly due to K's fondness for "gambling and white women."

Tito was not at practice Friday due to flu-like symptoms. He told the press he was at home watching the Anna Nicole Smith court proceedings on television. "I wanted to see if Manny [Ramirez] would show up there."

I didn't even have to make that last one up. And I don't even think I could have come up with a better punchline. Damn you, Tito!