I don't want to jinx anyone, so I've been silent as the Phils improbably crept back into the wild card race. They're only one game out now, with the Reds looking bad. Hell, the whole league looks bad.
But then...
(sweating)
I notice that a certain team has won 8 straight...
(clamming up)
And they're just two games behind, even more improbably, with a cast of youngsters.....
(choking)
the Florida Fucking Marlins.
(getting flashbacks of 2003, diving under tables)
(Honestly, you're at .500 right now. Just stay there. Just go even for the rest of the way, and you'll probably win this thing. I don't care if it will be the least impressive playoff berth in baseball history. Just freaking be medicore and let there be a playoff game in Philly for the first time in 13 years.)
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